Brothers Campfire Housekeeping (Sickening Satire)

Hello, Benjamin from Brother’s Campfire here!

Trigger Warning. If you are sensitive, do NOT read this post.

If you read it and get Triggered and decide to leave a comment, I will likely respond to your triggered comment.

You can stop the cycle of satire here!

No take backs. You were warned.

Below are two glue guns. If you pull back the lever, you may become unglued. Here Goes.


In my last post, I covered a little about how I began writing here at the Campfire. I also spoke about a transition from fictional dilemmas to real life concerns.

So, I have additional houskeeping about a Nonconcern for me.

Recently, I have been asked if someone likes posts on my behalf.

The answer is no. Who does that? I pay real money into this site (well, someone does) and cannot afford a professional liker. I suppose I can get one cheap on Fiver. (Nope, checked)

I need something special apparently

My perspective on likes is not altruistic.

Such is life.

I try hard to be a sweetheart, but sometimes, well… Here it is.

Who Cares?

This is Frank. (For the fragile, Frank is fake, but not FakeFrank because FakeFrank is a band.)

Frank is sad about his poetry blog. He writes 2 liners like this.

I hate fake likers, stole my heart, little pikers. ๐Ÿ˜ญ

I like Franks 2 liners. Frank is well… frank.

Every once in a while, Frank stops by and likes one of my posts. Since I like Frank, his like reminds me that his blog is out in the blogosphere and I return, binge reading 10 or 12 pages of his posts, liking every one of his sappy sob sonnets.(well, besides the lines and syllables)

It took 2 minutes or less. Easy Reads.

Well, Frank is upset with me because I looked at his blog too fast and liked all of his two liners. Frank feels I should have left a meaningful comment on each and every one. He also felt I did not absorb the true meaning of his post.

Poor Poor Frank. No. Not really.

Sorry….frankly, Frank, you lost me because you are worried about the irrelevant.


A menu.

Frank, fortunately, if you do not wish to see my likes, don’t look at them. Look at what makes you happy … Or sad.

Agggh. I hate my life.. I am a like magnet.(๐Ÿค”)

Note the Notifications. You can turn them off.

Also, you can change menus to the all important comments section.

This is the menu I keep my phone on. I get likes all the time. All through my sleep cycle. Guess what, with the Notifications off, I can sleep the whole night through, oblivious to someone leaving the dreaded like. ๐Ÿ™„

Ok..I got ahold of (fictional) Frank.

No.. No… On the phone, silly.

His poetry work is dark and somber and he hates likes. What was I thinking?

Did you know there are potential options to remove this feature? I started of without likes. Here is the fateful day I requested the install.

Like Button Post

If you have gotten this far, you are either ready to like this post or like all of my posts and comments to show me how irritating it is.

Bet you wont.

Author: Benjamin

Benjamin Thiel is a community leader, urban farmer, and author of The Ongoing Tale at Brothers Campfire. He might know a guy...

77 thoughts on “Brothers Campfire Housekeeping (Sickening Satire)

    1. Benjamin says:

      No. You have never complained about likes. I was worried about you when I used that example. I call you Mel

      1. YouLittleCharmer says:

        No need to worry – I’m only joking with you ๐Ÿ˜

        I would never complain about anyone’s likes or comments!
        I’m forever grateful that anyone reads my ramblings let alone anything else.

        It was your ‘sappy sob sonnets’ line that made my eyes widen – but only in jest my friend, only ever in jest


        1. Benjamin says:

          Friend, you have been nothing but nice and civil with me. You have allowed me to rebuttal your poetry with my own. Ypu are a beautiful person, Mel. Perhaps we will see her again down the road!

        2. Benjamin says:

          Have you thought of writing a Sappy Sob Sonnet? I would probably like it!๐Ÿค ๐Ÿ”ฅ๐ŸŒš

          1. YouLittleCharmer says:

            I’ll see what I can do!! ๐Ÿ˜

            Sure Mel will be back around the campfire soon enough – once she’s put her beer down for long enough that is!! ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‰๐Ÿ–ค

          2. YouLittleCharmer says:

            Ah yes, the tattoo!!
            Perhaps she’s had it covered up with something more demure during her time away..? ๐Ÿค”๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ–ค

          3. Benjamin says:

            Ha ha! We may never know. Her modesty is impeccable. Except for that time she rolled her sleeve up past the wrist. That was embarrassing to write!๐Ÿค ๐Ÿ”ฅ๐Ÿ˜ฐ๐Ÿ˜…๐Ÿ˜…๐Ÿ˜…

  1. Sarah Angleton says:

    Maybe WordPress needs to join the likes of Facebook and add additional emotional responses, but I can’t decide what kind of emoji would express: I really appreciated the opportunity to dwell on your dark and thought-provoking poem. ๐Ÿค”๐Ÿคจ๐Ÿ˜•๐Ÿ˜ฎ๐Ÿ˜Š

    1. Benjamin says:

      Ha ha ha!๐Ÿค ๐Ÿ”ฅperhaps I will start leaving expressive emojis instead of likes! I had not thought of that. You know, this idea should go down in history… Practically of course. ๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ˜Š๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ’™

        1. Benjamin says:

          I have some catching up to do over there. Don’t get upset at the likes, ok? ๐Ÿค ๐Ÿ”ฅ

  2. Offshorewriter says:

    Lol….. ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚ Stop crying Frank. He does really read all your posts! ๐Ÿ˜ƒ๐Ÿ˜ƒ

  3. Cindy Georgakas says:

    hmmmm wonder where this great post was inspired by… ๐Ÿคฃ! Maybe some brilliant unique someone. Glad I could provide you some material but I never coulda done it quite so clever and funny. Hysterical! I feel bad for all the Franks. and like them, ๐Ÿคฃ

        1. Benjamin says:

          Lol! It would be preferable for the owner of the blog! The time on page counts to the value of the website.

          1. Benjamin says:

            I am well sir! Just finishing up a chapter on the Ashton story.

  4. herbthiel says:

    I am a bit disappointed. You may have been frank, but were you in earnest. You should be Frank and Ernest. No, that might get you into copyright trouble. Never mind.

  5. achme24gmailcom says:

    That would be way too much work to do all that so I’ll leave that to Frank

  6. Hangaku Gozen says:

    On Twitter I used to see ads for services that would buy you Likes and Follows. I think Twitter got rid of the fake Likers and Followers (who were mostly bots, apparently), but I used to wonder who would subscribe to that sort of service anyway. I think bloggers earn comments and likes by being engaging and funny, which you are, sir. I can’t speak for Frank at all….

  7. hcmorris77 says:

    for the most part, I have notifications turned off on my cell phone. The only notifications I get are comments and follows. The same goes for emails….I’d never get anything done if I got all notifications, all the time. While I like likes, the views are just as important! When my likes are higher than my views, I know someone isn’t actually looking, just liking and moving on. But I don’t dwell on it, doesn’t accomplish anything!
    You have to take everything in stride, luckily I haven’t really gotten any negative feedback…but, it’s still early!
    Hope you have a great day and week ahead!

    1. Benjamin says:

      I like real likes and views just like everyone else, but I am not as particular as some are when people fly by.

      I am already interested in warm weather though!

      1. hcmorris77 says:

        Haven’t really gotten cold here yet, chilly days, but not real cold. I’m thankful for the wood stove…radiant heat is much better than electric

        1. Benjamin says:

          I like woodfires! I usually get pine and hardwood is a luxury. The weather is everchanging here. Watch. It will be warm tomorrow.๐Ÿค ๐Ÿ”ฅ

          1. hcmorris77 says:

            Pine smells good but isn’t good for wood stove unless it’s really, really, really dry. At least that’s what I’ve heard. Burning locust cut from the property right now.

          2. Benjamin says:

            I have a locust in my backyard. I don’t recall ever burning any. Worth a try.

          3. Benjamin says:

            Good to know! We have scrub oak here. The locust here has large thorns. Are they the same there?

          4. hcmorris77 says:

            Yes, there are thorns.
            Sorry it took so long to respond, I went to bed…

          5. Benjamin says:

            Time does not matter to me on WordPress. I just got up myself. Thanks for passing that on. ๐Ÿค ๐Ÿ”ฅ

    1. Benjamin says:

      Now that perplexes me. Some folk will email me with that sort of thing. I guess I can like them less in the future๐Ÿค ๐Ÿ”ฅ๐Ÿ™„

  8. Omatra7 says:

    I always read posts as much as I can… I donโ€™t always get to posts consistently but I try and do eventually

    I donโ€™t usually read others comments on posts that are not mine? Only if I question the post or want to understand it better or see perspectives? But typically no on the other people comments ?? I dunno just how I do? I have a little rhythm when I am going along lol

    I donโ€™t do anything to the alerts on WP… I do however have the notifications shut off at work sometimes – cause I canโ€™t be in with a family and having my phone be ding … ding ding lol omg ๐Ÿ˜„ yeah no that cant happen

    So I will silence it if I need to… usually at home or at night I like the notifications ON… and if I sleep – I wonโ€™t hear at all anyway

    Do you know the movie โ€œwhat about Bob?โ€ You know the scene where they are trying to wake him and NOTHING wakes him – until that alarm goes off ?? ๐Ÿ˜„๐Ÿ˜„ yup you betcha – that is me ๐Ÿ˜„โœŒ๏ธ

    Well I just love WP… I donโ€™t like social media because of the pressure and crap I feel there – I like it better here instead โค๏ธ

    1. Benjamin says:

      Hello Trisha.
      While I do not care about spam likes one way or the other, but I do respond to almost each and every comment.I keep my notifications limited and come to the app to see what is happening. I keep my media time low and I do not have Facebook.


      1. Omatra7 says:

        Yeah I donโ€™t do any social media – I only do this, the blogging. I just like this.

        Social media … hmm I have a Facebook but I walked away from it after my last surgery… I just went completely silent all across the board, on social media and in real life – everywhere… I just needed to heal from things and be left alone.

        But I will tell you… I think social media can be dangerous?? When I stopped – oh it was so nice… so peaceful and relaxing and I kinda had life back… I actually like living in 1995 lol โœŒ๏ธ

        And I have been away from all that now for over a year… I do miss my family and friends on there -very much… it is only them that makes me not totally delete, but I can not bring myself to go on

        I also feel that I DO NOT trust social media, with whatever information it collects about me… I donโ€™t like that… plus I donโ€™t want other people getting information about me to do bad things

        I want to have my own mind and think for my own self and not be told how to think or have anyone else influence the decisions I make except myself

        I also think social media is very harsh?? It is nothing like blogging or the blogging community

        I am not an advocate for social media – I am the opposite

        I know people love it and it is used for connection purposes or getting the word out – blah blah blah

        It just seems dangerous on many levels – it has a dangerous side to me so I just stay away

      2. Omatra7 says:

        I donโ€™t always respond to posts – sometimes I have nothing to say or add lol ๐Ÿ˜„โœŒ๏ธ (enjoy that peaceful moment lol๐Ÿ˜„)

        I am not really sure what spam likes are – I really just use this very simply.

        I write โœ๏ธ… I read … I interact – thatโ€™s pretty much it lol

          1. Carax&VanNuys says:

            I’m not on Facebook etc. either and the blog alone can be very hard to maintain at times… ๐Ÿ˜ฎ

            Also, I’ve been told not to leave so many likes?!! Weird, it still is. But I really love reading comments and liking them as well. ๐Ÿค”

            Take care! VVN

          2. Benjamin says:

            Maintaining this site is my guilty pleasure. Any more would be overwhelming!

            Like away! It helps both our sites if I am not mistaken.

  9. alisendopf says:

    There is no end to how people will get offended. I always thought giving Likes was a way to give back to the blogging community. Who knew there was a Dark Side of Likes?

    1. Benjamin says:

      The Dark Side Beckons, ALISEN! More Likes !
      You are welcome to offend me wit them as much as you like!

      Thanks for dropping by today!

  10. Susi Bocks says:

    I’m scratching my head to understand why someone would be upset that you liked but did not comment. You read it and liked it! That’s a good thing!

    1. Benjamin says:

      I know. Here is the thing. When I started blogging, I painstakingly wrote well thought out lines and poetry for every post I read only to have them spammed or awaiting moderation that never occured. Now, I like posts and
      I write one liners like “great read๐Ÿค ๐Ÿ”ฅ”

      If I get a response, I am more likely to re engage in conversation.

      Likes, even spam ones are somewhat beneficial for SEO as far as I can tell.

      1. Susi Bocks says:

        I follow 400+ blogs so unfortunately I just can’t read all of them but when I do read them, if I enjoyed reading them, I will like them. Should they tug at my heart or make me laugh or go above and beyond, I might comment. But normally, I just don’t have the time to comment on every single one.

        1. Benjamin says:

          I get it. One of the things that frustrates folks is when I unfollow and follow. It happens to me several times a day in my feed by my readers.

          If I worried about the motives of every one, I would become physically ill. I have followed as many as 900 blogs and I have to trim here and there.

          I am glad you stopped by to bring sanity to all this!๐Ÿค ๐Ÿ”ฅ

          1. Susi Bocks says:

            You just do what makes sense for you! Glad to be of service. ๐Ÿ™‚

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