The Puking Peasant Inn 2/13/2020

Disgusted with the Fighting Monarchs and Sellsword Swallowtails at a local coffee shop, Galvin the Bard returned to the Puking Peasant for revenue.

A Sellsword Swallowtail

His arrival was met with the aroma of fresh rolls and salted butter,

Now With Sliced Cheese. Sorry, Lydia Potter

but it was quickly stifled by the stench of vomit steaming from designated buckets. The Screaming Peaches, a local brew refined from local produce, did not sit well with everyone. 

Not Recommended

Scoping about for folks with coin, Galvin made an abrupt introduction.

“Hello, I am Galvin! Some call me the Bard. “

The regulars at the Puke expressed their excitement in colorful explanations.Well, perhaps expletives.

Galvin continued.

“I see Kelly K Green, wanting search bar

Got what she asked, who could want more? 

Thanks Kelly, for the suggest, 

When Galvin gets working,

He does his best!”

“I was looking but don’t see,

For Prudentia Sit with me.

You see, real smooth and clean,

Installed search bar on the scene. 

His fees are quite in reason, 

This cold winter season.”

The crowd was tough, sallow, evil looking man shouted, ” Stop advertising and give us a show!”

Galvin was undeterred.

“I see here a sailor, a baker and farmer, 

Look, a dark soul, You Little Charmer.”

Drowning sorrow in the corner,

Quaffing Peaches, a little mourner.”

She was not pleased and threw a roll at Galvin.

“The ship of rhyme is me who steer,  

At another Bard I shake the spear. 

Galvin’s Prospective Replacement

I am quite the charming fellow,

However,

Watch careful, my stiletto.”

“While sing I the fool’s words 

am not one flighty

I make one to swoon,

will fell quick, the mighty.”

“To perform at yon Puking Peasant,

Requires skill one might resent. 

As others quaff the Screaming Peaches,

I place bagged coin in safe reaches.”

“I place a bucket to rank and station,

Kindly give to me donation!”

“I am doing the fund raising, 

For a couple you be praising.”

“Have You heard the news?”

Violet and Wayne to be wed!

They may have a party,

Where you can be fed.”

“Ha Ha! 

I wander and see Watchman Wayne,

The price he pays with little gain. 

Nothing well or in his favor,

Blooming Violet he did savor.”

“Watchman Wayne 

pulled her from the harbor, 

fought minions for her honor,  

procured a custom hammer 

from someone in the slammer.”

Wayne and Violet were shocked and embarrassed.

“A man of honor, courage and duty, 

He has found Violet is volatile and moody.”

Everyone laughed.  

“Planning wedding elegant and frugal, 

Wayne knows nothing of such things.

Violet wants special, life been brutal.

Visitors many, church bell rings.”

“Thank you Pukes, for donation,

I extend to you wedding invitations!”

“I leave as abruptly as I came,

Love it’s spark, Campfire flame.

Great care for wants and needs,

You get all my proceeds!

We wish you well, Violet and Watchman Wayne!”

This was quite unexpected for Wayne and Violet. He had made enough coin for something nicer than they had planned.

Author: The Storyteller

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