Outside The Puke

Hello Friends! This story is heavily inspired by the Erratic Engineeress! Check out her cool travel and opinion blog! She pitched a character for my use and I am running with it! Thank you, Erratic Engineeress!

Puking Peasant Inn

Galvin the Bard packed the instrument given to him by the Heron in its case and left the Puking Peasant. His song did not do that well, but it was not his intention to sing in the first place as he was not on the schedule. It was time for bed.

Footsteps!

He was followed. Turning, he looked and saw a scrawny, red haired woman in a hooded cloak. 

She held a small dagger.

 “Your cheese or your life, Sir!,” She said with a flourish.

Galvin smiled. “ I suppose you want a little meat on the bone and my gold as well, my lady?”

She was erratic.

“Of course! and a little ale will suffice!”

A little is too much!

Galvin laughed. It was apparent she was drunk, but she was dangerous and feisty.

Glancing around, he saw Watchman Wayne on patrol and beckoned him over. 

“Will you help this young lady find her home? She is armed, erratic, and fiesty.”

Wayne Winced. The last redhead he met in the middle of the night he fished frozen from the drink and somehow they got hitched with a hammer.

Wayne’s Bride, Violet

(Hitched with a Hammer means Married for those of you unfamiliar with La Longi customs)

“Where do you live, young lady,? He asked respectfully.”

“Oh everywhere,” She replied. Sanctimoniously, she continued. “I go from place to place stealing my share of cheese and ale. Have you ever couch surfed, most noble sir?”

Wayne cleared his eyes with his thumb and index finger and looked at Galvin the Bard. “What have you gotten me into?”

Galvin shrugged and the cheese thief continued. “here is a piece of advice for you two. if you decide to travel, don’t go to “Find Yourself”.

there is nothing about packing clothing in a bag that will help you do that. travel for the love of cheese. you wouldn’t happen to have any, would you?”

Wayne saw his out to this ridiculous situation. “My lady, I have just the thing for you.”

Opening a bag slung over his shoulder, he pulled out his lunch and handed it to her. 

Quickly, she rifled through the carefully wrapped packages. “ A La Longi cheese wheel!  She exclaimed, jumping up and down. “Thank you!”

La Longi Cheese Is Worth Fighting For. If you haven’t tried, you wont understand.

She darted off into the darkness. 

Galvin was thankful that he had not been robbed, though he may have been able to handle it alone.

 “Wonderful Wayne! We no longer have a wistful wino robbing weary rhymers!”

Author: The Storyteller

Don't count the lions. It will make you afraid and slow you down.

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